could you hear me?

Sunday, July 31, 2005

here i am to worship..

After church. Self-reflection after a game of basketball with the youths. Highly entertaining in the third person's view. Maybe it's just me. I'm judging, once again, with what I experienced or felt. I know I'm not supposed to judge. Who am I to do that? Perhaps I myself seek acknowledgement from others. The want to be acknowledged and the realisation that i'm existing in your lives. But perhaps I did not present myself to be "of use" in the execution of activities thus I was not acknowledged. Or maybe because I had too much attention placed on me that some simply feels that I do not need theirs. It's ok. I'm fine without it in the very first place anyway. I will not seek yours then. If I'm nothing in your eyes then it shall remain as that. I will make no attempt to change anything. If God wants you to change, you will. Somehow..

Alright. The above passage is about someone I just met. Nvm. I'm just rambling nonsense..

Service. I'm really glad. God is always helping me. His Words spoke to me. He heard my prayers. I felt loved. Thank You Father! You're altogether lovely, altogether worthy, altogether wonderful to me. And I've been sad about it all the while. I need to keep repenting. Is that "Godly sorrow" or "worldly sorrow"? I want to change. I did change alot. I need more change. Then I would be able to rejoice. I would be able to experience exceeding joy once again. Triumph over the devil.

I always thought that to live is evil. But I was so wrong. Something tells me today that living is not being evil for the first time. I think He is the one who corrected me. I realised that there must be a reason why "evil" is spelled backwards of "live" and "devil", "lived". It's because evil is the direct opposite of living. We live not to be evil. And if one is, then one has been a devil and had never lived. =p There should be some truth to this. I'm glad I got the correct idea.

I've grown a little detest of people who do not respect their words. What you speak is what makes you. And also guys who disrespect girls. Just because you're a male doesnt necessarily make you superior. Nvm..

Random crapping.

Mum and sis are away. Haiz.. Gonna be a really quiet week. =S Prayed for their safty. =) Went out with bro and I've realised that we can still talk like normal bro and sis. Hmm.. We did lotsa crazy stuff too. Went to cut our hairs.. Hahahaz..
Ruth-Skunk || 7:44 pm