could you hear me?

Monday, September 12, 2005

what else could i say but thank You with all my heart

I really wanna thank You Lord for helping me brave through today's paper. And though I constantly ran out of points and elaborations to write on, I still want to thank You for carrying me on and not giving up on me. More than words can express how I feel when it's all over. I really really just wanna thank You and sing Your praises forever and ever. Thank You Father for keeping with me. I love You..

Every step the floorboards cracked.
Every scribble the pen made.
And the bell goes every 45 minutes
Creating a huge impulse in the blood.

Aye. Shucks really. I always jump when the bell rings. Crap. But then again, it reminded us of the time didn't it? So I'm kinda on time for the first time in my entire JC econs paper life. Thought I went out of point in the last qns but luckily I found that I answered part b for part a. So ya. Was kinda horrified when I first realised it. Phew. Thank God for that! Amen!

And yes, it was terribly cold. Shivering the whole time. Only recovered when I stepped into the warm morning sunshine out of the college. But my fingers didn't. Had pins-and-needles until I reached Khatib. Haiz. What's wrong? Too cold? I know pins-and-needles is caused by a rush of the blood into the capillaries resulting in a stinging sensation felt by the nerves. But hmm.. Should be too cold bahz. Right.. Don't think too much.

Couldn't sleep the entire night last night. Haiz. Think I worry too much. My mind was filled with econs stuff. Then drift away abit but I'd subconciously bring it back again when I reminded myself not to digress. Really weird. Woke up at 2 to find my sis going to sleep. Woke up at 3 again like every other night. Then 4 when I finally couldnt take it anymore and also because I wanted to wake up at 4 to mug more. I couldn't finish la! Only touched till Intl' Trade. ROG was NOT touched. Though I had mini revisions here and there. And I gave up on Labour beforehand. That was gonna kill me. Lucky no Labour qns, nor trade. Either that or I didnt notice. I just spotted 3 qns and started doing like crazy ler. Didn't bother reading other qns. Haiz. Is that what will become of me during As? I hope not.

And yea, I sorta rushed home. Don't know la. Just don't feel like talking. And I was really tired. Just felt like walking with God alone. Just wanna talk to Him and tell Him about everything, like how I used to talk to my dad, though I'm sure He knows already. And I just wanna sing praises to Him. To love Him. Haiz..

I'm sorry I ever doubted You. I know I shouldn't. "Trust the Word of God and never doubt it." I learnt it now. For listening to evil I experienced a hollowing out of His love.

"Go away, Satan! For Christ the Lord is in me!"

Is it ok that I said that? Hmm...

I love my mum lots.. Though we everytime made her angry. Though I shouted at her in the midst of my anger sometimes. I know I shouldn't. And I should have controlled it. I love you, Mum! Though I don't think you will see this as you don't know my blog. Your birthday's near. Though you refused to celebrate it I'll still get you something. I hope.

You give me heaven and you took it away.
I miss you more with each passing day.
I need a miracle now, so tell me
How can I change the world?
Cause I sure can't change your mind.
Where's the miracle I need now?
Gotta get to you somehow
Cause I can't change the world.
Ruth-Skunk || 12:01 pm