could you hear me?

Friday, August 26, 2005

realisation..

Days hasn't been exactly been good. Though I prayed for it. On the bus. I don't care what people think I might be doing, taking a quick rest of the eyes or whatsoever. I don't care.

You ah.. So angry for what.. Haiz. I don't know Him as well as you do. You are right. But just let things happen by itself k? Everything in its time.

For once in my life I don't feel that great afterall.. Or maybe I have always felt so small..

"(In times of adversities) We cannot let the pain grow until we lose ourselves too." Saw that on "Touched by an Angel". Gosh I love that show. I guess it happened to me too many times. So much so that despite we know that it is Him who control all things, we still feel upset by the way they turned out to be. But we shouldn't stay there for long, we should move on and see what it will lead to. I guess I havent been doing much of that.. I still refused to let go. That's bad..

I don't really understand Father. Sometimes it's me, sometimes it's others. But I'm glad that You made all of us to help each other to overcome our own adversities. We are Your gift to others, to help ourselves to be strong. To see each other as we see You as You made us to look like You, to remind ourselves that You are our Father.

Beth (or is it Darryl) from Rachel's Tears is right. Human seek two things in their life, survival and significance. Significance comes only after we have achieved the first because when we are struggling to survive, we wouldnt care less about whether we are important to others. But however hard I tried, I can't seem to get the acknowledgement I yearn for so long. I may not appear that I care, but I really do. It's alright.. I'll bear with it. As long as I have Him. He loves me, right Father?

It's alright to have doubts. Thank you all. I know I shouldn't, but I do. And I wont hide it. Life is but a learning journey. Have qns? Ask! =)

Life itself is our own testimonials.

I lack the ability to evaluate and explain these few days.. Haiz. Brain dead. And have not started studying.

I thank God for giving me every day, every breath, and every lesson of life. I love You!
Ruth-Skunk || 9:57 pm