could you hear me?

Monday, September 26, 2005

hiding behind a mask.. weakling..

Hate to wear mask at home. Just to hide the disappontments from school at home. It's really torturous. Hurts so much. It's getting so much harder to hide now. Sometimes I just wish no one will catch me when I enter the house. I just felt like becoming invisible for that moment in time.

"He will send angels to guard the night and day."

Where are the angels? I'm scared. I'm weak inside of me. I want to feel yet emotionless. All I could do is huggle myself and talk myself to sleep every night. The prayer felt weak. Churching helps a lot. And my walk alone with Him sometimes. But I tend to drift away from the talk with Him to something else. Why?

The background music at Dage's closed blog. It's titled "Spirited Away". I like to go up to her blog and just leave it on and listened to the midi. There's this sadness everytime I do. It felt as if all my memories were there and had came to an ending. I'll cry with it sometimes too.

"Cause I don't belong here in heaven.." - Al
Ruth-Skunk || 11:46 pm