could you hear me?

Friday, December 30, 2005

mellow..

Aye.. Have you come to a time when listening or singing a happy song cannot make you happy anymore? I guess this is what I'm feeling right now.. I'm just feeling melancholy right now. Probably the after-effect from the quarrel last night with my bro. And sms-ing Jie makes me fume a bit more as I keep dwelling on the topic. So sorry Jie.. I didnt mean it.. Aye.. =(

Reached home.. Had a hug from my sis. Wanted to cry but I didnt. Aye..

Think I get upset very easily now. Stupid.. Where's the strong old me? Dead? Haiz..

"There is melancholy in the wind and sorrow in the grass." - Charles Kuralt

Maybe I listened to too much sad songs by Jay..

Or maybe the sadness had been brought over from Christmas.. Haiz.. I really don't know..

Have to learn to be happy.. Not just on the surface.. But seriously be happy inside, just for Him.. Jie knows, I've been struggling with the definition of "happiness" for a long time already. Everytime I got closer to it, I'll fall back down on my knees and cry again. I don't know why. Perhaps the evil around is at work..

Aye I must be blind.. Should have recognized it, but I didnt. -.-

A lil chat with Tab actually makes me feel better. I don't really talk to her, real life or online, but this time round I feel fine. Hmm.. God's angel. =)

We're all angels. It's just whether we make ourselves useful or not..

I've decided on a Christian name.. Hmm.. Should change my ic..
Ruth-Skunk || 1:57 pm